Love your mother, mother and mother…

**************** In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful; blessings and peace be upon Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. ***************** Reflection ***************** The Declining Day (Al-'Asr) **************** 1. By the declining day, ******************* 2. Lo! Man is in a state of loss, ******************** 3. Save those who believe and do good works, and exhort one another to truth and exhort one another to endurance. *************************** MOTHER’S day is celebrated on the second Sunday of May. This year the celebration falls on the 13th May. In this column I would like to pay tribute to all mothers especially that special woman who had moulded me into what I am today. She’s none other than my mother. ****************** Since a few years back I was responsible for her well being, almost every Wednedsday I had to take the day off to take her to the Melaka Hospital for her weekly consultation and appointment. Nowdays she needs to go to the hospital or community clinic almost daily and that this was one reason I decided to opt for an early retirement at the age of 50. ******************** After retiring, several readers had SMS and called me asking me not to abandon my column and this gave me encouragement and strength to slog on. ********************* My mother is a full time housewife; very busy in bringing up her children – eight of them, I am the second in the family. Almost all my siblings including myself went to residential schools; I must admit during those schooling years I was not too close to my mother because time spent at home was limited only to school holidays. ********************* To be able to enter secondary residential schools, one had to pass with flying colours at primary level. During those primary years, I witnessed how my mother who was very young (she married at 14 and perhaps at that time she was not even 25 years old) toiled to prepare the food for my siblings and me to take for the afternoon session school. ********************* During those years, my family did not have a gas stove. Cooking was done by using firewood. It was difficult to start a fire especially when the wood was wet during rainy days or seasons. I witnessed how my mother scrambled to do her work – washing the clothes, cleaning and sweeping the house and then do the cooking at the same time attending to the needs of my younger siblings who were toddlers and babies. ******************** Yes, it was very difficult to start a fire during the North East moonson season as strong winds (my kampung folks called it ‘Angin Utara’) blew into the village. My mother lighted pieces of old newspaper or rubber cut from old bicycle tubes and tyres and put them under the firewood. *********************** But it was no easy work to make the wood burn, so my mother had to blow and blow the stove. One morning I saw her face blackened from her work. It was hard work just to boil water, cook rice and fry fish or eggs and mould them with ketchup or ‘sambal’ (gravy) so that her children would be able to bring coffee and rice to school. The food had to be readied early as the school bus came at 11.00 am. We would be at school until 6.00 in the evening. ********************* When I was in Standard Two, one day my rice ration which was kept in my school bag overturned; ketchup made marks on my books. I tried hard to wipped off traces of the ketchup marks but was in vain. So for the whole year in Standard Two almost all of my books had ketcup marks on them. *********************** Looking at the ‘ketchup books’, I could not help but kept thinking of my mother. I knew she had sacrified a lot for her children, so to make her happy I thought why not I study hard to please her. It worked, and Alhamdulillah (God willing), I scored 5A’s in the Standard Five Assessment Examination, and a year later I enrolled at the prestigious Malay College Kuala Kangsar. ************************* As regarding to Mother’s Day, I called upon men whose mothers are still alive to devote energy and time to give the best of help to them. It is common knowledge that majority men would give priority to their wives rather than to their mothers, what’s more if they are beautiful and do have in terms of worldy prossessions. A scholar had risen out this point beautifully: “Nowadays, a husband is allowed to witness his wife’s labour when she is delivering. Some husbands video-tape the event; they could witness great pain of their wives’ suffering. But do not only think about your wife’s suffering, remember your mother too experienced the same pain when was delivering you decades ago. ********************** “Please men out there; there should be no doubt or uncertainty that your mothers experienced and endured labour, giving birth with a great deal of difficulty, a great deal of labour pains, a great deal of suffering and pains. ******************* “So you should knelt at the feet of you mother, seeking forgiveness for you had always sided your wife, giving priority to her above your mother!” ****************** A few days before writing this piece, I received by post ‘a precious gift’ (a book entitled ‘Let Us Remember Allah – For the Gift of Love in Our Hearts) from the writer herself, Dr Safiah Osman, a government servant retiree from Petaling Jaya. She signed the book with a note; “Sdr (Brother) LanH, may Allah SWT richly bless you and your family.” *********************** Alhamdulillah, I was very lucky indeed to have received that gift a few days before we celebrated Mother’s Day. In her book which was published by Muslim Aid Asia Sdn Bhd, Dr Safiah who was a Professor of Language Education at the University of Malaya and also a Professor of Language Education and Director for International Relations at Universiti Pendidikan Sultan Idris (UPSI) Tanjung Malim, discussed 39 topics on love beginning with ‘Love for parents’ and ending with ‘Love for those who are not greedy and miserly’. ******************* Dr Safiah said the aim of her writing the book is to create awareness, especially amongst the young people of the world, of the need to thank Allah SWT for His clear reminders that there must be love, fondness and kindness in our hearts. ***************** Regarding ‘Love for Mothers’ which is timely during this special celebration of Mother’s Day, among others Dr Safiah wrote: “There is nothing which can measure the depths of a mother’s love. Her love is endless, boundless, and limitless without boundaries. When all around us there is a great deal of grief and misery, a great deal of heedlessness, carelessness, thanklessness and inconsiderateness, a mother’s immense love shines through the darkness, glowing with her cheerfulness, kindness and goodness. ****************** “Truthy, there is no greater love than a mother’s love. It is a love wich restrains us from walking off alone into the wilderness, into life’s wilderness and dreadful darkness. ******************* Let us keep in mind what Prophet Muhammad, the Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him – pbuh) said: “Love your mother, love you mother, love your mother and then love your father.” ******************** The complete version of this hadith which was narrated by Abu Hurairah is: A man came to Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) and said, “O Allah’s Messenger! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your mother.” The man said, “Who is next?” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your mother.” The man further said, “Who is next?” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your mother.” The man asked (for the fourth time), “Who is next?” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Your father.” (Al-Bukhari – Hadith No. 5971) **************** Happy Mother's Day. 'MAK', I love you! And 'PAK' too!